Squinty-Eyed Laura

Pirate Missionary

Laura was recruited to the CIA during ninth grade. Her adventurous nature and research acumen made her an invaluable member of the "Company's" Artifact, Ruins, and Treasure (ART) unit. When she was promoted to head of the department she completed intensive training with Britain's MI-6 where she provided back-up and research support to the famed Double-O operatives. During a routine operation in Prague, Laura "disappeared", using one of her many underworld connections. Free from the CIA, she is now studying International Relations at the Harvard of the West in order to facilitate treasure hunts in foreign countries and to manage the system of off-shore banks and dummy corporations that we use to store our treasure.

Laura has recently returned from a leave-of-absence. She was in San Antonio, Texas recruiting pirate membership. Sources indicate her second mission was to scout sites along the Mexican border through which Spanish gold could be transported from Latin America, effectively avoiding the involvement of the US government. The quantity of Hispanic gold disappearing from strong houses south of the border indicates she was successful.

Muddy Mary

Dangerous Princess Dancing Girl
Powder Monkey

There are only two critical pieces of clothing in Mary's wardrobe: her pink Disney princess night gown and her black tap shoes. These, together with a crate of bananas, a few oranges, and some chocolate, are all that are needed to sustain her happiness. Her contribution to the crew include cuteness, hugs, little dances, and excitement about nearly everything--especially bugs.

Bloody Mary

Ship's Carpenter, Oracle

Tracing Bloody Mary's history is difficult. We know that she left the southeastern deserts to attend the Golden Spike ceremony in Promintory Point where she met Pirate Grandpa, whom she later married. Previous to this, however, her story is clouded. Was she born human or coyote? Was she a were-coyote since birth or was this an aquired ability? The earliest record of her, and the only clues we have regarding her early life, are scattered newspaper stories of destructive chicken coop raids that could not be prevented with even the most sophisticated locks. These reports come from communities as far south as Santa Fe, New Mexico and as far north as Jackson, Wyoming, although they seem to center around a small community in southeastern Utah. Her nickname, Bloody Mary, was first given her by upset frontiersmen who had lost their chickens.

After marrying Grandpa Pirate, it seems she settled into a more human existance. Her ability as a fortune teller and oracle have been an invaluable asset to the family's treasure hunts.

Pirate Grandpa

Commander, Cavalry Regiment

Grandpa travelled to the USA from the old country in order to make his fortune in the California Gold Rush. After several years of panning for gold, which substancially increased the family fortune, he accepted employment as a federal animal control officer. His status as a Magician Merlin Class proved useful since his primary responsibility was rounding up dangerous fire-breathing Oriental Dragons that had followed Chinese railroad workers into the United States. He still carries the scar of a poisonous bite from a Crimson Manchurian Worm on his upper arm. It was while attending the Golden Spike ceremony in Promintory Point, Utah in 1869 that Grandpa met the oracular were-coyote Mary Louise who would later become his wife.

Grandpa uses his secret identity as a veterinarian to cover his more nefarious double-life as a treasure hunter and amateur astrologer.